Migraines and Morons


Right. Let's rant!

Yesterday I got a late birthday present from my brain in the form of a mind-killing, soul-destroying, migraine. The sort were you have tried pills, coffee, red bull, walking in the cold, sleep and are now looking at the long necked Phillips Screwdriver and figure that if you slammed your head on it hard enough it would push through your skull and kill you.

Instant relief.

It started to build up about an hour after getting into the office and by three in the afternoon had become a full on pain in the ass (or head to be precise).

This was problematic and annoying for many reasons. Reason number one was I had just gotten over a migraine on my birthday, literally the day before, so I had no reserves left in my body to handle another one. Let alone one this bad. Two, Ireland is having its worse winter in 30 years (apparently) and the roads were icy and it was snowing. Migraines are not fun when you drive anyway, let alone when you have to drive in the ice and snow.

Lucky for me the super sexy lady friend works but a short dart trip away and said she would come over to my place of work and drive me home. While not ideal (since I didn't want her to have to drive in the current weather conditions either) it was a plan.

She arrived, we got home, I asked her to kill me a few times to make the pain stop and the rest is history.

I don't like people seeing me with migraines this bad, because there is not a whole lot that can be done. Plus I know my fuse for being irritated is a lot shorter than it normally is and I am always afraid I will snap at a simple suggestion for help. Maybe next year Santa will bring me a cure for migraines.

I woke up this morning recharged, migraine free, and hungry (because eating was not my friend last night). Of course another bastard thing about migraines is this: if you get one you can bet your arse it will be during the time of day/week when you have no work on. But the second that alarm clock goes for work you will be pain free.

I swear one of these days I will write a paper on how Migraines are not just a neurological disorder but also intelligent in their own form, apart from the host brain they play havoc with.

So today I was all geared up to drive into work, but the lady friend did not think this was the best idea. I figured that I would not have her worrying about me driving in icy conditions and got the dart into work (which is actually handy enough since my job is right beside a dart station).

Now, it has been mentioned before that I hate public transport. I also hate the public in general. You put enough morons together and they form a collective herd of asshole. Public transport is full of assholes, with normal people hiding amongst them hoping to survive the trip.

My dart carriage was jam packed with morons this morning. As I got to my stop I moved closer to the door I needed to use to get off the dart, saying the polite "excuse me" a dozen times to people that seemed to think I was walking towards them to keep warm. Then, at the door, I encountered the biggest idiot of them all. The fucking idiot wouldn't move, his response being "I'm standing here."

Yes, I am very much aware of that you douchebag. You are standing in front of the fucking exit.

I decided to not lose the cool. Not let my rage have some fun with this gobshite. Instead I reached over, pressed the button to open the door, and walked straight forward.

Douchebag was a little confused by this action and moved a step to the left a second too late as my shoulder connected nicely with his own.


"I'm standing here." What did he expect me to do? Walk down the entire carriage to the other door.

There is something to be said for pricks like that when everyone is in the same crappy boat. If there was ever a zombie apocalypse this is the sort of guy that would throw people at the zombies to save himself, only to be caught by them later on and scream for help.

I mean it's freezing outside, you can tell the dart is more packed than normal due to people not taking cars to work. Is there any need to make that experience a little worse by not getting out of the way of somebody trying to get to work like the rest of the passengers?

The answer is of course no.

Hopefully my little lesson in manners will stick with him next time somebody asks him to step aside for a second.


Tags: migraines

L | Thu, 07 Jan 10 10:31:49 +0000

rofl... thats one of your better rants. I was loling and feeling guilty because of the migraine-ness.

=^-^= | Fri, 08 Jan 10 10:56:09 +0000

.....they are everywhere on the tube! :/

Mr. Tea | Fri, 08 Jan 10 12:39:57 +0000

I always wanted to know the collective noun for a group of assholes........a herd.....it makes so much sense. Thank you Jester.

blue_jester | Fri, 08 Jan 10 13:20:12 +0000

...a gaggle of assholes, but that was bordering on tongue twister fun. Plus flock did float about for a few seconds but then I would have called him a cock and who wants that sort of rhyme online?

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